Thursday, 30 January 2014
It is so lovely to be able to document all my experiences and things that I have discovered. Even the simple things bring me loads of joy. I am so excited about everything that I have managed to carry out in this little space of time.
While I was resident at Wedge Gardens I picked a few flowers and put them in my books to dry. They serve as a memory of all the good and bad times that occurred at rehab. I also picked two things in particular because at that stage it had a lot more significance to me.
I picked purple flowers around the yard, because it reminds me of all the relaxing times spent under the Jacaranda tree, pondering over what was to happen to me and all my new-made friends at Wedge Gardens.
The second image is of a fig-tree leaf, because I spent hours picking branches from the felled tree and stripping all the bark of it and making “wands” with the fig-wood. To this day you can still smell the figs on the wood.
Lastly I kept a little twig of rose-leaves which had a very special meaning to me. On the rose-bush right outside my window there were these leaves, all red on one side, nearly all red on the other, and they were the only coloured leaves on a bush doused in green. They were like the “outcasts” on that bush, yet they were right at the top, right next to their green mates, catching the sun first! That has a very big significance for me, because I was going through the time when I felt like an outcast and whether I would be allowed my “fifteen minutes” in the sun ever again.
It’s been a hard road, but with this great insight; great literature and a positive attitude towards the recovery-programme, self-image and life; I have attracted the life of my dreams towards myself! That is the greatness of the law of attraction.
Thank you, thank you, thank you…
To most people it is going to make no sense at all, and it is going to seem awfully gay! LOL! A grown man collecting flowers for his diary! Blimey, what a poofter! LOL! Until you find yourself in that situation where you have to come to terms with your life and recovery, you can’t even begin to understand what one goes through to reach that point. You want to see hope in everything, else you will sit and let your mind decay and convince you otherwise! These simple leaves and flowers gave me hope, because I saw them as souvenirs that I would be able to share with the outside world! I knew I would have the friends, family, followers and fans to share them with!